Wednesday 3 October 2012

Change is a Miracle Workshop


Begin with the miracle question because change is a miracle.

What if a miracle happened when you were asleep. Now that you are awake, you notice that a miracle has happened...

Read more about the miracle question here...

Visit Cycles of Change Coaching for inspiration and resources on integrated living, click here.

For more on the Change Is A Miracle Workshop, click here...

Thursday 2 August 2012

Burden to Blessing


Have you recently experienced a crisis, an obstacle or felt unjustly challenged in some way? What did you tell yourself about what was happening? Did you feel angry, frustrated, wronged and/or helpless? Did your self-talk reflect sentiments such as: ”How can this happen to me?” or “I am sick and tired” and/or “I just can’t do this anymore”?
Did it seem like it was the end of the world? I remember when my son was two years old and if he dropped something, he would get frustrated and upset with himself. To comfort him, I would often say: “It’s not the end of the world darling”. Then one day, I dropped something and must have over-reacted or been visibly upset. Imagine this sweet angel of a two year old putting his little arm around me and patting me saying: “Mommy, it’s not the end of the world mommy”. That was a wake up call to me. Since then, I have become better and better at putting things into perspective and not sweating the small stuff.
We all have times in our lives where outer circumstances take on the form of crisis, which we may even perceive as threats. We can allow such circumstances to dominate and rule our lives. Resisting what we are faced with can increase our sense of helplessness and lower our sense of well-being until we take the decision to recognize a burden as being a blessing. Such a turnaround begins with a change in perspective. This intention to turn a burden into a blessing is what can and does heal us.
We can train ourselves to see in the obstacle an opportunity – the opportunity is present and you can turn the worst of crisis into the greatest of blessings. Resisting crisis instead of nipping them in the bud means it can drag on for years on end. This is because what we focus on expands and grows, and focusing on how bothered one is, how put out one is, that one is being victimized and helpless, will exacerbate, prolong and grow the burden.
It’s not the outer circumstances that necessarily create the experience of crises. You do not feel gratitude and thankfulness when you are feeling opposed and contradicted, burdened and antagonized. However, you can feel gratitude, thankfulness and a sense of being supported even in the face of contrary circumstances. This capacity to see beyond the obvious and to respond beyond the learned reaction comes from your connection to your inner wisdom – something I often refer to as ones “Heart Call”.
By turning your attention to your inner guidance puts you in touch with your inner compass. This pure wisdom is accessible, available and instantaneous. This inner knowing guides you to your truth, the knowing that a burden can be a blessing. A willingness and openness to look within, where your true power rests helps you regain your balance and feelings of prosperity. There are a countless number of true stories written that hold testimony to the fact that misfortune holds the seeds of fortune, purpose and a meaningful life.
Obstacles and opportunities, burdens and blessings, misfortune and fortune are two sides of the same coin. Burdens are ultimately blessings – the flip side of the coin really. Financial loss, broken relations and more can be seen as slamming doors, however a redirection of your attention, based on your heart’s wisdom will guide you and support you into experiences where windows are open and you can go through them to something better, where loss becomes gain and therefore a blessing in disguise.
Life is a paradox, and so is everything really. With practice and new experience, your reactions make way for responsiveness. You know that you can change your thoughts, you can change the meaning you give to circumstances and events and looking over your life, you will find evidence of when you were able to make the most of a bad situation. Burdens can be seen as blessings and your thoughts are not in contradiction with your true nature. You can change your perceptions over time or you can begin with a new assumption, not the assumption that the burden is the end of the world but rather that the burden has a blessing and when you look for it, you can find it. So, you can begin with thanks, beginning with thanking for your inner wisdom, that you can connect to it and source it, that you have the power to transcend at least in perception, any circumstance. Taking charge of your reactions, you can choose to respond instead, turning to your thankful practices. When you do this, your life will flow better, more joyfully and freely.
What do you stand to lose by thinking that you can even for a few seconds at a time find things to appreciate – even if circumstances stayed the same. There is more to gain from doing this. When you change the way you see things, the things you look at change. You do have a choice, to resist what is or to act more thankfully. You can run your life, sourcing your inner resources rather than abdicating your power to outer factors. You can get into the habit of asking yourself: “The blessing is here, what do I need to let go of to see it?”
The oak often serves as a useful metaphor when we wish to remind ourselves to be resilient. However you have probably heard that what you resist persists, meaning that when confronted by something unwanted, the act of focusing on it and wanting things to be otherwise, just makes matters worse. You may also remember the fable of the willow tree and the oak tree competing with each other, to determine who was stronger than the wind. The oak tree resisted and broke and the willow tree, just went with it and thrived. The moral of the story is “bend like the willow, don’t resist like the oak.” You bending like the willow is remembering to bend your thoughts around the burdens and reach for the blessing that is present.
Many thanks and much Wisdom,

Tuesday 29 May 2012

Be Inspired and Change Something


Be Inspired & Change Something

Have you ever thought about using a coach? Have you ever used one in the past?

Those who have, have found it to be an immensely motivating and validating experience. For 30-90 minutes you are gifted with the focused attention on YOU and on what you want and need! You create the agenda and a coach will help you set the tone.

A coach authentically, and attentively nudges you and helps you shift towards greater congruence between you and your dreams.
  • A coach can help you connect to your mission and vision – showing you that you are never starting from scratch.
  • A coach helps you cultivate your great ideas, which may be hidden in distraction, just a seed waiting for loving attention to flourish! 
  • A coach is a supportive set of "believing" eyes – you know you have a good idea, a coach is a perfect person to bounce things off. Expect genuine feedback and even additional tools to stimilate even more creative ideas and connections.
  • A coach can help you process change and challenges in your life – whether you are facing specific challenges or you are ready to find clarity around things in general.
  • A coach can help you set goals, carry them to completion and embrace greater freedom.

Resources

1. Change is a Miracle, read more...

2. There are many ways to change a habit. This is an excerpt from a blog I wrote 2 months ago on the many ways of changing something...

Excerpt:
"The Power of Habit

I have promoted the power of practice. While I use the terms habit and practice interchangeably, there are slight differences in nuances, which is simply a matter of personal connection/preference.

What do the words habit and practice mean to you?

What is the strange looking puzzle on this page doing there? I enjoy playing with my ideas, playfulness is an attitude that I find powerful and empowering to bring into my practices, no matter what they are.

When you have an idea, you make it happen by turning it into a practice. What does play have to do with it? Practice is a serious business, yet practice to be sustainable, needs to embody "play". I have taken the 7 pivotal points of the Hero's Journey and represented them here as a puzzle.

Imagine playing with this puzzle. When something works for you, my philosophy is "play it forward"... this is the sustainability and appreciation I love to emphasize."

Excerpted from my blog, to read more and experiment with "new" practices and for more links and resources, click here...

Sunday 27 May 2012

Doorways to Love

Golden Doors, Open Doors

If the doors of perception were cleansed everything would appear to man as it is, infinite. For man has closed himself up, till he sees all things thro' narrow chinks of his cavern.~ William Blake 
The Expat's Way is about coming to your senses. We focus on 10 of them during the 10 week course/path. These too can be seen as the 10 Doorways to Love.

Create your own doorways and walk through them. Which one will you walk through now? possibility? abundance? connection?

Open the door, read more...


Thursday 8 March 2012

Open Up Your Habits to Different



I am here to transcend the everyday, the commonplace, habits that degenerates rather than regenerates...that depreciate rather than appreciate my potential. 

Everyday, I open myself up with courage to break my rules, to take risks, venture into the unknown and to redefine “failure”

I do not need to make bold, gigantic, changes. All that authentic growth asks of me is to change one thing... even a small thing... one thing that makes a difference. No, not the same difference but the difference that makes a difference!

Doing what you’ve always done in the way you’ve always done it, just gives you more of what you’ve always got. Such “non-actions” (actions that don’t make a relevant difference), I call “non-actions”.

I’m not going to start thinking of all the “lame” excuses as to why this task is impossible. Why would anyone want to waste their resources looking for excuses. The  hero’s journey is not one big adventure to find as many excuses as possible to not own your power and to not own your nature and originality. Perhaps it sounds extreme, that one has to disown the “comfort zone” choices (couch potato) to embrace and own our comfortable with uncertainty and magic person. This does not have to be a bad thing unless you want it to be.

A good place to start is always right here, right now. You are in the best position possible to make a difference. So, KISS it better... keep it super simple! Begin by simplifying your goals – with the intention to connect more fully to your strengths and to redefine your assumptions and rules, choose rules and assumptions that set you free.
Let's choose generative & sustainable goals (quality) over quantity this time. Let’s forget about the grandiose and focus on specific, meaningful, game-changing goals.
Start thinking in terms of your own formula for self-mastery. By the way, don’t get hung up on your formula or you will leave  yourself hanging out to fail. Let your formula not be set in stone... it’s a new and fluid set of rules and guidelines. Allow there to be exceptions when the exceptions are growth oriented! Let your formula be free to evolve and take you to places you have never been before. I like to call this an “open” formula for self-mastery.
1. Appreciative Inquiry
Reflect on what you have accomplished. I do this daily... At any point in my day, I take pause e.g. when I need a “time-out” or to recharge my batteries, to focus or center myself (and for many other reasons), not least because it begins with an oft-overlooked activity: meditation. I start by asking two questions: What went well? How can I take the good and make it better? It's a very simple but useful exercise that takes stock of where you've built new skills for success and where there's room for development. This a open-hearted assessment of what I’m capable of puts me in good stead to set and refine my goals as I go along.
2. Goals that Make a Difference
Brainstorm a list of meaningful goals i.e. that will make an impact. Now group these goals into categories or try to find common threads and themes.  Face it, you're much more likely to be successful if you: (1) Write out very specific goals and sub-goals, (2) write out a clear plan of action to achieve them, and (3) have a back-up plan for what you will do in case of challenges, distractions, and the like. Reflect on what matters most to you. Consider your purpose:
  • What am  I passionate about?
  • Are my goals driven by my passion and potential?
  • Are my goals directed towards action and performance?

3. Trim the Fat
Create a change with a "turnaround" list. To make a difference and to experience a difference, you need to notice a difference. The way to do this is to turn things around. To do this means what it means... you will be venturing into the unknown, learning to be comfortable with uncertainty and “letting go” of a lot of assumptions, ideas, beliefs and the like.  Replace depreciating habits with appreciating ones... this is the authentic turnaround. Get a piece of paper, draw a line down the middle. On the left side, list some habits. On the right hand side, write down a more appreciative version/variation. If you are going to turn your life around, you need to begin with turning your mind around.

~~~
Where Are You Now?

If you’re thinking you don’t have the willpower for all of this, you are right! Forget about willpower, you don’t need it. You need to own your own power, the one that lives in your passion, in your heart, in your potential... in what you are doing already that works. Noticing what works is beginning with yes, with a ta-dah. Riding the ta-dah wave will crest at aha! … that is it’s nature. Read my book for free, Passion to Performance where you will find the steps to use the “SMARTEST STAR” model for goal & change management. Finally, prepare for exceptions...to make them and what to do when faced with them.

Tuesday 14 February 2012

Happy Valentine's Day


Happy Valentine's Day


I encourage you to explore Self-Love - this asks of you to connect to your Heart's Desire, regardless of your relationship status.

In this Valentine's Day Message, I am offering you creativity tools & practices that will support you to do just that. This process of Appreciative Inquiry will help you discover what you are passionate about. A great act of Self-Love is to allow your attention to shift to what you truly want… Let's jump right in and make the most of this time and space (your Valentine's Day Gift to You) you've just created for yourself.

Embrace Your Passion
• What do I think passion refers to?
• When do I feel most strongly about something?
• When have I been most passionate about something?
• How do I feel when I am using my talents and strengths?
• Where do I get my motivation from?
• Who has impressed me because of their passions?

  • What makes time fly? (because time flies when you're having fun)
  • What do I wish I had more time for?
  • What would I do even if I was not paid for it?


You are happiest when...

Now that you are better connected to what you are passionate about, what next? You want to make plans to embrace your passion on a daily basis. Continue this exciting adventure with a free e-book, Passion to Performance on Scribed. You are also free to join me on Facebook at The Happy Heart Project and share with other Happy Hearts!


Wishing you one more Day (after day after day), living more and more heart-fully, passionately and happily!

Explore Play Appreciate
Aneesah

Sunday 22 January 2012

The Answer Lies In Front of You and Behind...

The Answer Lies in Front of You and Behind You At the Same Time

Usually I know I have a good insight by its paradoxical nature or the humor/humorous perspective it embraces.

In December, I posted the blog "It's Not Too Late to Make 2011 Your Best Year Yet". I put up a link to this on my page on google+.

This morning, as synchronicity would have it, I saw this crazy but* photo a friend had posted of a passer by in the street (fully clothed, but unusual enough to grab... one's attention). I then forgot all about it and moved on... to my google+.

Where I received a notification that someone called name name had posted a comment to this link. It read:

 "How to have a big but*?" 

I wasn't sure what to make of this. It could be genuine, someone thinking I am some kind of expert and good at giving answers. I ignored it for a bit and got on with my business. Then I wondered... let me look at this another time. I looked up name name... it looked a bit unusual... only 3 in circle... not much else happening, a male from Saudi Arabia (my name is Persian so I get a whole lot of weird attention from certain parts of the world... for all kinds of equally weird reasons).

That aside, I thought that perhaps I would just block the person without reporting as it could be a perfectly honest and harmless question... who's to say? So I hit the "block" button.

By nature, I like reaching for the highest perspective on things so my sense of humor came to the rescue... did I say, I also like to have fun? I thought, I could answer this in a way that if the person was genuine and needed advice, the advice would be useful. Also, it makes it more pleasant for visitors to my page if I diffuse the situation... take it to a better place. And if the person was up to no good, well, my reply would be equally ambiguous.

I wanted to write

"THE ANSWER LIES IN FRONT OF YOU"

But*, it would appear, that the comment no longer existed. So I had to leave it at that... until I decided to post this blog... just to remind myself that the answer can lie in front of me and behind me at the same time.

Very much like the message of my blog on It's not too late to Make 2011 Your Best Year Yet". To read this blog entry, click here...